Relationship

It was 6 months today that I went on a date with a guy I met on OKCupid. We met in Lachine in front of the Dairy Queen and we talked for about 3 hours  We met again a few days later, this time in Lasalle, near his place and the rest, they say, is history.

From date 2 my buddy in Ireland says I was hooked. He might be right, but I was in such mental state that I didn't give it too much thought. I was at home dealing with anxiety and the only thing I'd promised my doctor is to get out of the house and go outside my comfort zone. Driving to Lasalle and hanging out with him was a good way to accomplish what I had promised so went with that and didn't ask myself too many questions.

I could tell he was more into me then the last 4-5 guys I'd met off POF. He was more attentive, said the right things, and really made me feel comfortable. For as much as I am socially inept he's actually quite sociable and friendly and he can talk to anyone. He made me feel comfortable most of the time. Im highly insecure and usually I constantly question myself, I wasn't insecure.

He works as a nurses aid and used to have a carreer as a musician. He played drummer in several bands, including Dave Moran and the Panic band. Parenthood steered him towards a carreer in health but music is in his heart. Rarely does he spend any time not drumming on things.

I've never met anyone I clicked so well with. We are so much alike in so many ways, in the little things. I'm even enjoying cuddling all night with him and anyone who knows me knows I used to prefer sleeping alone.

So it's been six months today that I've been seeing my significant other. I've not said much because I didn't want to jinx anything. I've never felt so close to anyone and it scares me shitless but at the same time it's an awesome feeling. I'm not alone in the world anymore.

Interesting find online

While I don't believe in labels, sometimes they help you figure out things. I've never really been strong on monogamy, but at the same time I do build lasting relationships with people. Some of which are strongly emotional and intimate but the relationship itself is platonic and within standards norm of friendship or what society considers normal.

Of course fact I build such relationships just as easily with men or women, including some in lands far away puzzles some people, but it doesn't make me defective. It just makes me 'different'.

With time and age you realize that you can find people who you click with and like similar things you do and have similar expectations. I found this interesting article on  Solo Polyamory a lot of which makes sense to me.

I have many close friends, with close emotional bonds, including my 2nd ex husband. We might not have been "happily ever after' material but the love and friendship between us certainly hasn't changed. I told him not to long ago, that my condition to sign the divorce papers was that he had to promise that I would always be a friend, that I could not stand losing my friend. We were good friends before we became more and losing that good friend would really hurt.  But I should have no such fears.  We're good. He said as much and he was sincere. I could see it in his eyes.

My family these days consists of my daughters, my close friends and my cats, and sometimes I'm not sure I want a primary relationship. Those are often messy and complicated.... and I don't do well in them.