Women don't ask to be raped

I can't believe that a police officer said at a safety and security forum at Osgoode Hall Law School “I’ve been told I’m not supposed to say this, however, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized.”

The first thing it does is make victims feel like they were responsible for being raped.  The whole comment "not dressing like sluts" for starters is so subjective. In some countries unless a woman's skin is completely covered and she is wearing loose opaque clothing, she's considered a slut. On the other side of the coin you can go to a beach in brazil or in Europe with nothing but a thong and that's not considered slutty. And you have every dress style in between.


I remember back in the earlier 90's the loser I dated for about 1 1/2  years decided to judge the way I was dressed. He asked me if I was going to work like that. I was wearing a skirt that was maybe 2" above my knee. He commented that if he was my boss he would send me home to get changed . That what I was wearing was completely inappropriate and would be very distracting to male employees.

For starters, if a male cannot do his job in the presence of a female then he's the one with the problem. The second  argument I had for this loser, was that since he found long flowing skirts more sexy then short skirts because it leaves to the imagination, then by his reasoning his female employees could not wear short or long skirts. Then of course there are women who wear slacks, or jeans. Plenty of men find women in pants sexy, so women can't wear those to work either.

So basically he was telling me that because I was female I should stay home and out of sight so that I was not distracting to men.  Funny argument for a kept man. I was the one with the job, he stayed home full time. I told him that if he wanted to continue dating me he was not to comment on the way I dressed for work in the future.

Especially considering I work for a company that has no dress code, and where one of the two owners wears Bermuda's, polo shirts and flip flops in the summer. In the 18 years I've worked there I've seen the man in a suit exactly once. It was also the only time I saw him wearing a shirt and tie. Normally he wears khaki's or jeans in the winter.

I still can't believe in this day and age in a country like Canada where woman's equality is guaranteed under the charter of rights, that people in law enforcement would still make such stupid comments.  I mean how does this guy explain when 80 year old grandma gets raped? "Sorry grandma you didn't cover those varicose veins and sagging breasts enough. You were asking for it".  I mean people never say that to males who get raped, that it wouldn't happen if he had dressed differently. It's scary to have a police officer who still believes this misconception.

How does this officer explain the fact that rapes are just as frequent in societies where women are completely covered?   I mean it's easy to constantly blame the victim. 

Rape is not about sex. It is about power, control and humiliation. Women of all ages have been raped and there is no conclusive evidence to suggest  any type of dress or behaviour would have made it more likely to have happened.